Sunday, May 29, 2011
Movie Review # 90 Allan Quatermain and the Temple of Skulls [The Asylum] 2008
Director: Mark Atkins
Writer(s): H. Rider Haggard (story), David Michael Latt , Matthew Alson Thornbury
Cast: Sean Cameron Michael, Christopher Adamson, , Natalie Stone
Rotten Tomatoes: 18% Audience
Netflix: 2.3 Stars
Another day and another Asylum production. This time it is Allan Quatermain who is making fun of Indian Jones. It is this type of mockbuster production that drives fans and critics insane. It is also the reason that so many hate these movies as they steal plot lines from the movies or have names close enough to the real one. That fool the viewers into thinking that they are getting the real movie.
Thankfully this is not one of them. At the same time though it is sickening on another level. As this screws up a amazing literary work. That being H. Rider Haggard's book King Solomn's Mines. Which has been made into several movies one decent, one great and this abomination of a film. That is so boring, and slow that it should be used as a torture device on certain prisoners.
As it has no replay value or first time value for that matter. Other than to laugh at how silly it really is. Especially in one scene where Quatermain is coming out of a bathroom and you see a motion detector in the background. Complete with flashing light. But if that was the only goof it would be up there with Indiana Jones and his Cobra behind the glass scene. But no it isn't as you see modern power lines, power adaptors and other things like plastic beads being worn by the Zulu's at the end of the movie.
I know this was shot on a budget but lets get real here. These type of gaffs are inexcusiable for any movie. Especially one that you want people to pay money for. Sadly people are fooled into thinking these are amazing movies based on the covers and posters. Especially one that looks like a Indiana Jones cover. Just do not fall for the gimacs. As a cover only tells one thing that they want you attention.
Nothing else so use your resources and inform yourself. So that you do not end up with this piece of crap in your video collection or in your Netflix cue.
My Rating: 0/5 Stars