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Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Movie Review # 22 The Journey to Promethea

Release: 2010
Writer: Dan Garcia

Rotten Tomatoes: Not even listed! Yeah I know this is going to be bad.
Netflix: 2 Stars

How bad can a movie be that not even the mighty Rotten Tomatoes has a listing for it? Even Kung Fu Mummy had a listing? Yeah I know. Is this really the question one must ask when reviewing a movie as bad as this one. I just have to though. I honestly find it as a warning to avoid this at all cost and I will just say I agree you need to let this movie fall through the cracks and not watch it.

So what made this film so awful? EVERYTHING!!! Nothing is redeemable what so ever and this movie is going to only get a slightly higher rating than Kung Fu Mummy! Yes folks this is a negative numbers movie. So here is the story. A mighty soldier dies then says one of his chose people will inherit his great powers and sword. Yep sounds cliche and it is as this movie seems as if it was written as a bad Dungeon and Dragons campaign. Then someone had the bright idea of going out with the LARP (Live Action Roleplay) group and filming this abomination of a film. 

The biggest question is why does Billy Zane choose to do movies that Dan Garcia does? Seriously he is in several and they all suck. But unlike Uwe Boll who makes crap films of good video games. This guy Dan Garcia just makes shit films that makes Ed Wood seem like James Cameron! Then again Bela Lugosi starred in several of Ed Woods films. Maybe good actors just like being in bad films for a pay day. That or they just hope that no one notices these shit storms so their careers do not get railroaded because of them.

Sadly for Billy this is not the 60's where Bela was at the end of his career. Where Ed Wood's films where shown at midnight shows and often forgotten about except by the cult following they got. This is 2011 where Netflix is rampant and these horrible movies get ridiculed mocked and torn apart. Leaving you with a tarnished name and people not wanting to see your next A-List film. All because you chose to make a film like this. Grrr I hate this film so much.

So back to the movie at hand. Oh screw it! I refuse to talk anymore about this film. Seriously this is just not worth the time to talk about. So please avoid this! It is not fun or goofy or remotely good in any way. It is not even worth doing a movie night for bad films. Just no repeatedly NO!

Rating:  Negative - 4.75/ Stars out of 5

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